January 20, 2012

Wonder Juice

This is a sonnet. I want your feedback on it. Yeah, you!

Magical liquid simmering in mugs.
A few sips and my veins start to buzz.
It makes me want to give everyone hugs.
Leave it out for a few months, it grows fuzz.

Makes me talk like Master Yoda, it does.
What a wonderful morning pick-me-up.
It's so delicious, I drink it just 'cuz.
Waitress, you better pour more in that cup!

If you want to live, better fill 'er up.
Mr. Greene claims that it's bitter, like life.
I don't have a problem, shut the hell up!
Hand over the sugar, I HAVE A KNIFE!!

I'm sorry, swear there's nothing wrong me!
I just love to drink gallons of coffee.

3 comments:

  1. Pretty dramatic, I liked it. It kinda jumps to and fro and I couldn't really get a clear image of this piece, but I did get out of this was that you were really hyper!

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  2. i think that this peom is very light and funny. i like how its not very serious in its tone, but it still gets a point across. im sure all the coffee drinkers in the world would be happy to agree with your statements in this poem. it sounds like you could almost turn this into an ode as well as a sonnet. great job painting a picture of how you feel and act after you have a fresh cup of coffee. this is definetly convincing to go and have a cup right now. great job

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  3. i shouldnt have read this during the final...i started laughing when you said you dont have a preoblem then you pulled out a knife...hahaha

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