December 16, 2011

I Feel Ambiguous About her

Tom shrugged. "I feel ambiguous about her."

"I think you mean 'ambivalent'," I said. We sat down at our desks.

Tom rolled his eyes and pulled out his notebook, "Just because this is English class, you don't have to correct my word choice."

"I am just trying to help you. So why do you feel ambivalent about Anisa?" I discreetly nodded toward the girl in the front left of the classroom. She was flipping through her binder.

Even though she wouldn't have been able to hear, Tom still hissed, "Keep your voice down!"

I leaned back in my seat and smirked. "I think you like her."

Tom jerked his head back and forth. "Come on, Jim, she's a freaking freshman. She's also in, like, drama club. How lame is that?"

I said nothing, knowing Tom just needed to voice his feelings and then he would realize what he truly felt. Tom continued.

"And yet...She's a mad good vocalist. And she really gets into her acting...but that's lame, right? Plus she's not popular or anything."

He glanced up at me, and I gave him a knowing smirk. Tom sighed and shrugged once more. "I feel like I like her."

"I think you mean 'love'," I said, and for once, Tom did not complain about my correction to his word choice.

This is a writing exercise we did today. I'd like to hear your reaction or maybe some helpful tips for how to improve it.

1 comment:

  1. This story has the potential to be made into an even better and greater story. I really like how the guys talk, but I'm not really sure if it was supposed to make me laugh when Tom said things like "mad good." I think this could be really great, I want to know more. I want to know more about Tom and Anisa's relationship. Were they just friends and then his friend figures out her likes her? Are they secretly dating? Are they total strangers and he's just randomly in love with her? I like how Tom likes her even though she's completely lame. Those are the bet love stories to read.

    ReplyDelete