September 30, 2011

Experimental Coffee

This is the writing exercise we did in class today involving fish flavored coffee. I'm looking for any friendly advice about how I can make this more interesting and add more to it.

Jean sat in her room, trying to think of a new flavor of coffee. Her taste buds were bored with the flavors already out there. She wanted something fresh, new, and exciting. As she sat cross legged on her bed, she glanced at her goldfish swimming without a care in his fish tank.

" Well Willy? You got any ideas?" she asked, frowning at the goldfish. Willy ignored her and continued swimming. Jean sighed then got an idea. Why not try fish flavored coffee? Now to make it would be the challenging part, she thought as she grinned at a now frightened Willy.


  1. I liked this one a lot. It was short, but didn't need anything added to it. The last part made it funny and I enjoyed it greatly. If you wanted to make it longer you could explain how she had tried every single coffee flavor in the world or had tried to create many new ones before this. It would be even more interesting if you added a last few sentences about her sipping her coffee and calling the flavor 'Willy Nilly Coffee'. But all in all, it was very funny and interesting.

  2. This is interesting. A lot of people already had the existence of the fish-flavored coffee, but this story explores the mysterious origins of the awkwardly flavored beverage. I would suggest that you make it a bit longer. Maybe talk about the process that Jean goes through to try and invent the coffee. It would also be interesting if there was something special about her goldfish. Perhaps it reveals the secret of making things fish-flavored? Other than making it a bit longer, I thought this was an interesting story.